Publication: National EnquirerDate: 1 Feb. 2010
The Flagship has decided that most of the cover should be given to Kirstie Alley this week. Hey, if you are going to put her on the cover, she's going to take up most of the cover anyway! Am I right?
Ha, ha. Fat joke.
Kirstie made some jokes about eating dogs and children and "pretends" to be dating hunky actors. She also made some depressed statements about doing herself harm, and The Flagship thought all of us should know about this.
On a slightly serious note, I feel for Kirstie Alley. She's just turned 59 years old, so it's not like she's ever going to look as hot as she did 30 years ago. I'm over 50 and I'm overweight, and if every conversation about me began and ended with "Jeez, that guy let himself go! Why is he so fat?", there might be some You So Crazy Alert™ about me, too, assuming I was a celebrity people actually wanted to talk about.
In conclusion, a note to young actresses. If you get a chance to play a hot Vulcan chick in a movie or on TV, turn it down. This never ends well.
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