Least interesting cover story of the week: Bret Michael's heath and upcoming wedding.

Publication: Star
Date: 9 May 2011

Star has a headline about Bret Michaels' health and upcoming wedding to his longtime girlfriend. They do not have any picture to accompany this story, so I won't put up a picture either.

Way too many gossip rags are getting into this habit.

Bret Michaels opens up: My life now.

Publication: In Touch
Date: 11 April 2011

Last April, Bret Michaels was hospitalized with a brain hemorrhage and for a few months became a regular on the covers of The Only Ten Magazines That Matter. There was a lot of speculation about his health and his lifestyle, but those stories have faded away. In Touch has an exclusive interview with him this week.

Bret Michaels brave new surgery.

Publication: Weekly Life & Style
Date: 7 February 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! Bret Michaels made the gossip rags regularly last year after his sudden hospitalization, but most of the recent stories about him have been about everything being fine, his family being his rock in troubled times and the fact he finally proposed to his baby mama. But this week, it's back to stories about his health as Weekly Life & Style says he is about to undergo some brave new surgery. Checking online, the surgery has taken place and it repaired a whole in his heart.

Bells Are Ringing Alert™:Bret Michaels proposes.

Publications: People, Us Weekly
Date: 10 January 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! Both People and Us Weekly report the confirmed story of Bret Michaels finally proposing to longtime girlfriend Kristi Gibson, the mother of his two adorable daughters.

I pay next to no attention to Mr. Michaels' private life, such as it is, but this makes that reality TV show where a bunch of sluts vied for his affection using various combinations of implants, alcohol and fellatio really extra super creepy.

In accordance with this blog's pro-love policy, we wish the happy family all the best.