On the rocks alert: Lauren Conrad and Kyle are no more.

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 11 July 2011

Us tells it readers about the "shocking split!" between Lauren Conrad and her longtime boyfriend Kyle Howard. The headline reads "She believed Kyle was The One, but after three years and no ring, Conrad finally got the courage to say goodbye."

I had kinda sorta heard of her, but I had no idea who he was and I still don't.

Backstage gossip from Dancing With The Stars.

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 2 May 2011

Last season, there were a boatload of Dancing With The Stars stories on the covers of the gossip rags, but it's been a little quiet this season so far. Here are the headlines from the story in Us Weekly.

• DWTS Meltdowns! Hookups! Feuds!
• Kendra - backstage tears
• Kirstie - control freak
• Chelsea - Dating LC's ex

The main characters that have been the targets of gossip have been Kendra and Kirstie, but a new name gets added this week, DisneyTeen™ Chelsea Kane. For people over the age of 25 (and for those under that age who actually have lives), LC is short for Lauren Conrad, a reality TV star.

You're welcome.

Fussin' and Feudin' Alert™: Lauren Conrad and Whitney Port

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 28 February 2011

I'm a lot more hip to gossip than I was when I started this silly blog at the beginning of 2010, but the headline from Us Weekly had me scrambling to Google for help.

LC and Whitney: Jealous New Feud

And there were pictures of two young white girls, so I knew the Whitney couldn't be the world's most famous Whitney of the moment, Whitney Houston.

LC is Lauren Conrad, who I guess was kind of the star of the now defunct MTV semi-reality TV show The Hills. Whitney Port was also on the show, but she didn't even get a mention in any of the supermarket rags last year before the show was off the air.

You will notice that I gave their full names in the title of this post, assuming these people are not even close to famous enough to be known to the public by first name only or initials.

You're welcome.