Problems With Plastic Alert™:Plastic surgery shockers in the Enquirer

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 19 July 2010

The Flagship has a bunch of pictures of celebrities on their cover this week and all of them look like death eating a cracker. There's one "Guess Who?" picture with the caption making it harder to see who it is, but I don't go for that. Here's the list of the people they identify.

Nicole Kidman: It's almost required by law now that if you are going to do a story about bad plastic surgery that you include Nicole Kidman. She's only 43, which means she's between the ages of Jennifer Aniston and Courteney Cox, who both look really good and mostly natural, but her face looks stretched tight the way much older women look after bad work.

Janet Jackson: She's always had a very wide smile, but wearing very little make-up in the picture on the cover, she's starting to look like The Joker.

Barbara Eden and Tina Louise: These were two of the prettiest women in Hollywood back in the 1960s, but they are both in their mid-seventies now and not willing to admit it. Eden looks stretched and Louise looks hacked. Very sad.

Christopher Walken: Walken is 67 and he looks it. His skin is saggy, but that's what happens when you get older. The Flagship found a very unflattering picture of him. I've been online and seen recent pictures where he looks better than he does on the cover.

Octomom: Her picture is part of this story, so I mention her. She doesn't get a label. The other people actually did something entertaining to become celebrities, so in my book, she doesn't belong.

Problems With Plastic Alert™:Plastic surgery shockers in the Enquirer

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 19 July 2010

The Flagship has a bunch of pictures of celebrities on their cover this week and all of them look like death eating a cracker. There's one "Guess Who?" picture with the caption making it harder to see who it is, but I don't go for that. Here's the list of the people they identify.

Nicole Kidman: It's almost required by law now that if you are going to do a story about bad plastic surgery that you include Nicole Kidman. She's only 43, which means she's between the ages of Jennifer Aniston and Courteney Cox, who both look really good and mostly natural, but her face looks stretched tight the way much older women look after bad work.

Janet Jackson: She's always had a very wide smile, but wearing very little make-up in the picture on the cover, she's starting to look like The Joker.

Barbara Eden and Tina Louise: These were two of the prettiest women in Hollywood back in the 1960s, but they are both in their mid-seventies now and not willing to admit it. Eden looks stretched and Louise looks hacked. Very sad.

Christopher Walken: Walken is 67 and he looks it. His skin is saggy, but that's what happens when you get older. The Flagship found a very unflattering picture of him. I've been online and seen recent pictures where he looks better than he does on the cover.

Octomom: Her picture is part of this story, so I mention her. She doesn't get a label. The other people actually did something entertaining to become celebrities, so in my book, she doesn't belong.

Dig up a corpse, why don'tcha?Re-open the Natalie Wood case!

Publication: National Examiner
Date: 21 June 2010

Several stories this week have made it necessary to create a new label, "Dig up a corpse, why don'tcha?" I have also gone back and re-labeled some older stories. The common link in these stories is the idea that some dead celebrity was in fact murdered and there needs to be a new investigation. So far, all these requests for re-openings have been from the three meanest tabloids, the Examiner, Enquirer and Globe.

This week, the Examiner suggests that new evidence in the Natalie Wood case could shed some light on this very cold case, given that Ms. Wood died in 1981. Also on the cover are pictures of her husband Robert Wagner and her co-star in her last film Christopher Walken.

(Aside: Ms. Wood in a publicity still from Gypsy, is using the pose I like to call "Are you staring at my butt, and if not, why not?")

Dig up a corpse, why don'tcha?Re-open the Natalie Wood case!

Publication: National Examiner
Date: 21 June 2010

Several stories this week have made it necessary to create a new label, "Dig up a corpse, why don'tcha?" I have also gone back and re-labeled some older stories. The common link in these stories is the idea that some dead celebrity was in fact murdered and there needs to be a new investigation. So far, all these requests for re-openings have been from the three meanest tabloids, the Examiner, Enquirer and Globe.

This week, the Examiner suggests that new evidence in the Natalie Wood case could shed some light on this very cold case, given that Ms. Wood died in 1981. Also on the cover are pictures of her husband Robert Wagner and her co-star in her last film Christopher Walken.

(Aside: Ms. Wood in a publicity still from Gypsy, is using the pose I like to call "Are you staring at my butt, and if not, why not?")