Hairdresser Alert™:Carrie Fisher confesses John Travolta is gay.

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 27 December 2010

Fresh trash tomorrow! Last trash of the week... right now!

The Flagship decides to take an interview Carrie Fisher gave to The Advocate and spread it to a completely different audience. Ms. Fisher, who can be a very funny writer and has always had a mouth on her, said in an interview with the gay magazine that it is a well-known secret in Hollywood that John Travolta is gay and she's sorry he is so uncomfortable with it.

I have two problems with this story.

One, if someone isn't a gay-bashing politician/preacher/whatever and he wants to keep his sexuality private, I say let him keep it private.

Two, the word "confess" in that sentence. If she said she herself was gay, that would be a confession. Telling a third party somebody else's secrets is not and can never be a confession. It's usually called "ratting" or "snitching" and there are good reasons why rats and snitches have a bad reputation.

Stay classy, Carrie, and as always, stay classy, Enquirer.

Hey Old Timer (and not so old timer) Gossip:Where are they now?

Publication: Globe
Date: 6 December 2010

The Globe devotes most of the cover this week to a passel of "Where are they now?" stories. I am going to split the celebrities into two groups, ones who were famous before I graduated high school, a.k.a Hey Old Timer Gossip, and the ones whose claims to fame came after I graduated.

The old timers first.

• Andy Griffith
• Hayley Mills
• Shirley Temple
• Erin Murphy (Tabitha on Bewitched)

The somewhat younger crew.

• Lynda Carter
• Richard Moll (Night Court)
• Carrie Fisher
• Peter Billingsley (A Christmas Story)
• Chris Darden and Marcia Clark

If you have any question as to why I picked a picture of Lynda Carter to represent this group, you will never have a career in tabloid journalism.

Just sayin'.